Pokémon Emerald Update #12

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After many tries Tate & Liza were finally subdued. I am certain that there will be no further troubles on this island…

Ah, crud. I am getting so damn sick of these fudgin’ thugs I just want to kill the [expletive removed] bastards. Grah!

Before Henny goes all mental, let’s go to Shoal Cave.

Shoal Cave – Contains Shoal X and Pokémon Y.
Zubat – Very Common
Golbat – Rare
Spheal – Very Common
Ice Floor:
Zubat – Very Common
Golbat – Rare
Spheal – Very Common
Snorunt – Common

Shoal Bell is inferior to Leftovers, but then again we don’t have any Leftovers at the moment. We are lucky; it’s low tide. Definitely better than high tide. Also, don’t worry. Nintendo wouldn’t be so cruel as to drown your character if it flips to high tide while you’re exploring.

So let me get this straight… this guy stands here 24 hours a day, his feet wet during 12 of those hours, making Shoal Bells for people without any sort of monetary compensation? Just what the heck is wrong with these people?

This is what it looks like at high tide.

I meet another Mauvillian who gives me a Focus Band. He seems to be a bit of a masochist.

Ooh, it’s like an enormous refrigerator. Where’s the ice cream? Apparently ice cream is Nevermeltice and TM07 Hail.

At first I think it’s one of the local populace. I approach it, wanting to buy some tourist crap, but it appears to be a Pokémon. I’ll have it as a souvenir, then.

Note: Besides the Snorunt and Spheal families, there’s only one other Pokémon in Hoenn which is an Ice Pokémon, Regice. And because you don’t want to be a stinky cheater you won’t use it. Having an Ice Pokémon could be very helpful in getting through Pokémon League in one piece.

Snorunt/Glalie: Being a pure Ice type, it has one resistance and four weaknesses. Evolves fairly late. Glalie has 80 base stats in everything, and such a wide specialisation isn’t all that desireable. While undoubtly cool, I think I would prefer to use Walrein instead. (Ice; Inner Focus)
S – Powder Snow
S – Leer
7 – Double Team
10 – Bite
16 – Icy Wind
19 – Headbutt
25 – Protect
28 – Crunch (I like)
34 – Ice Beam
37 – Hail
42 – EVOLUTION
53 – Blizzard
61 – Sheer Cold

Spheal/Sealeo/Walrein: Superior stats to Glalie, it also has more resistances. Also has STAB on Surf, which is nice. Can be a supreme companion and opponent. (Ice, Water; Thick Fat)
S – Powder Snow
S – Growl
S – Water gun
7 – Encore
13 – Ice Ball
19 – Body Slam
25 – Aurora Beam
31 – Hail
32 – EVOLUTION
39 – Rest
39 – Snore
44 – EVOLUTION (Only two levels later than Glalie)
50 – Blizzard
61 – Sheer Cold

I see a Freudian space rocket thingy which really doesn’t look like its capable of space flight.

“I gotta tell you. I am so intoxicated at the moment due to these frequent clashes with the Teams I have trouble distinguishing them from ordinary people with similar demeanour. You look like a Team Aqua grunt to me.”


“Team Aqua grunts don’t give me gifts. Well, ‘cept my favourite deranged sailor back in Slateport. Hmm…”

“‘Chintzy’? O.o”

1. of, like, or decorated with chintz.
2.cheap, inferior, or gaudy.
3.stingy; miserly: a chintzy way to entertain guests.

“Not to fret. I shall defeat you through susi and sheer moroxity. And our mutual understanding to battle each other seperately than all at once.”

My Pokémon actually outnumbered their Pokémon two to one.

Like Maxie’s previous plans, I’m ASSURED there’s a sensible motive behind this.




“*facepalm* Maxie, you card.”

“I guess it would be amusing to see how Maxie would go about transporting the fuel to Mt. Chimney without blowing himself up in a gory explosion in the process…”

“But battling Maxie is always pleasing.”

I choose Tentacruel, Nosepass and Breloom to be my protagonists in the upcoming battle. They smile like hungry wolves. Or hungry jellyfish, Easter Island men and mushroom lizards, as it happens. Why I can only choose three Pokémon is beyond me, but my mental inner voice says there’s a perfectly good explanation for that.

I hope Steven’s Pokémon won’t be too much of a baggage.

Steven looks a lot less happy than on the global in-game map thingy. Oops, fourth wall again.

Both Tentacruel and Metang had Clear Body. Owned with a capital P.

Camerupt got a critical hit. Poor, poor Camerupt. 1987-2010 R.I.P.


Tentacruel’s Attack is up by four points and she’s confused, so we’ll switch to someone more adequate.

Tsk tsk.


And that’s how the battle ended.

Off he goes on his next retarded plot. Perhaps he has ADD. Tentacruel wonders why we don’t simply kill him. I wonder that as well.

We’re going diving.

Well, I swam out to the deep areas, preparing to Dive, then… I realized I didn’t have any such Pokémon. My brain isn’t working well sometimes.

Wait, what happens if Gyarados uses Dive, when Tentacruel has used Surf? Hmm…

Fortunately, I happen to be extremely good at holding my breath. Or I have gills. I don’t know what the f*ck.

Swimming in the seaweed (yuck) underwater can make Pokémon pop up:
Chinchou – Common
Clamperl – Very Common
Relicanth – Rare

Looks like we’ve found a sixth member in our team.

Watch for those shards, too, as they yield evolutionary stones.

Huntail: Maybe there is a hidden logic in having a Pokémon with 104 base Attack which doesn’t learn a single physical move. Maybe. Or perhaps the developers at Gamefreak, who probably were smoking a lot of pot back when this game was made, simply mistook Crunch for a physical move yet again. Which it doesn’t even have STAB on. And is one of those Pokémon you can only get through trading. Sigh. (Water; Swift Swim)
Trade with Deepseatooth – EVOLUTION
8 – Bite
15 – Screech
22 – Water Pulse
29 – Scary Face
36 – Crunch
43 – Baton Pass
50 – Hydro Pump

Gorebyss: Better than Huntail due to its far better Special Attack, no doubt. But I still failt to see why the effort of getting a Deepseascale in-game and then trading it is worth this. The Pokémon world is not exactly suffering from a shortage of Water Pokémon. Heck, you can get Starmie pretty easily and it pwns the crap out of Gorebyss in terms of usefulness. (Water; Swift Swim)
Trade with Deepseascale – EVOLUTION
8 – Confusion
15 – Agility
22 – Water Pulse
29 – Amnesia
36 – Psychic
43 – Baton Pass
50 – Hydro Pump

A Gorebyss siphons the body fluids of prey through its thin, tubular mouth. Its light pink body color turns vivid when it finishes feeding.

Its swimming form is exquisitely elegant. With its thin mouth, it feeds on seaweed that grows between rocks.

It lives at the bottom of the sea. In the springtime, its pink body turns more vivid for some reason.

Its pink body becomes more vivid with the rise of water temperatures in the springtime.

Gorebyss is an omnivore and turns vivid at the drop of a hat.

Chinchou/Lanturn: I like this Pokémon. It has 5-6 resistances and only two weaknesses, and STAB on both Water and Electric moves. I know using Magneton would be smarter from a gameplay point of view (with its 120 Special Attack and it comes available earlier) since I already have a Water Pokémon, but then again I wanted to be a bit different and use Pokémon I normally don’t use this time. Volt Absorb not only makes it immune to Electric, it also gains HP if an Electric move is used. (Water, Electric; Volt Absorb, Illuminate)
S – Bubble
S – Thunder Wave
5 – Supersonic
13 – Flail
17 – Water Gun
25 – Spark
27 – EVOLUTION
32 – Confuse Ray
43 – Take Down
50 – Hydro Pump
61 – Charge

All right, I think that’s all

Relicanth: It has 130 Defense and 90 Attack, but not really any good moveset to follow this up with. And it’s not like Water and Rock was the best type combination ever. Plus, it becomes available so darn late in the game. But be sure to catch one, as it has plot significance later on. (Water, Rock; Swift Swim, Rock Head)
S – Tackle
S – Harden
8 – Water Gun
15 – Rock Tomb
22 – Yawn
29 – Take Down
36 – Mud Sport
43 – Ancientpower
50 – Rest
57 – Double-Edge
64 – Hydro Pump

All right, I think that’s about it for today. ‘Til next time!

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One Response to “Pokémon Emerald Update #12”

  1. Pokémon Index « Procrastination Embodied Says:

    […] Pokémon Index By procrastinationembodied The playthough of Pokémon Emerald: Update #1 Update #2 Update #3 Update #4 Update #5 Update #6 Update #7 Update #8 Update #9 Update #10 Update #11 Update #12 […]

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