Pokémon Emerald Update #3

“You were nearly wiped out by a puny bird!”, I scream at him. “Damn, you suck!”
“I am not pushing you too hard.” *whip lash*

Since time is frozen in my game, replanting seeds is totally ineffectual. I’ll just wreak down those bushes and leave barren wasteland behind… to the tune of that cheerful melody. 🙂

I enter the streets of Petalburg City. It has a total of six buildings – a place bigger than anything I’ve ever seen before. My abusive father runs a gym here. He used to beat me up a lot when I was a kid. I shall never forget his horrible whiskey breath. Hoping my father hasn’t seen me yet, I sneak out of the city as soon as possible. However, I am being stopped in the tracks by a “rookie trainer” (an agent of my father’s, of course) who, at gun-point, suggests I should check out the gym in town. Well, damn. I enter the gym and see my father, standing there. The look he gives me petrifies me. He is about to say something when a kid, wailing, enters the gym. He requests that my father help him catch a Pokémon. I expect my father to break his neck at this preposterous request, but instead he calmly borrows him a Zigzagoon and a shiny Poké Ball (which he had promised to give to me) and suggested that I instruct Wally to catch a Pokémon. The old man’s just screwing around with me. Me and Wally walk out into the tall grass and encounter a Ralts. I try to give him as crappy advice as possible, but he manages to catch it anyway.

Steaming mad, I slap my father with a silk glove and challenge him to fisticuffs. Too much of a coward to fight, he calls me a “greenhorn” and says he won’t battle me unless I can show him four badges. Very well, but he is only procrastinating on his own inevitable defeat and humiliation.

Some dude asked me about my “profile”. I gave him two phrases in hopes that would be it. Also, as I was leaving the town a pimp calling himself Scott complimented me for my incredibly clean clothes. I spouted my new profile at him, and he fled.

Route 104 – Contains the cabin of a deranged retired sailor, a forest and a flower shop.
Marill – Common
Poochyena – Very Common
Taillow – Common
Wingull – Common
Wurmple – Common
In water:
Magikarp – Very Common (Old Rod, Good Rod, Super Rod)

There are two parts of Route 104; they are seperated by Petalburg Woods. In the first part, note the empty cabin. It’ll be of interest later.

Taillow/Swellow: The belated early bird. The strongest quality of it is that it learns Wing Attack, a 60 power move, as early as level 13, and fully evolves as early as level 22. It doesn’t have many other advantages beyond that, however. The Guts ability raises Attack if the Pokémon has a Status Effect. (Normal, Flying; Guts)
S – Peck
S – Growl
4 – Focus Energy
8 – Quick Attack
13 – Wing Attack
19 – Double Team
28 – Endeavor
38 – Aerial Ace
49 – Agility

Azurill/Marill/Azumarill: Don’t use this unless you want a real challenge. This is a really crappy Pokémon. Thick Fat decreases the effectiveness of Fire and Ice-type moves and Huge Power increases the Pokémon’s Attack power in battle. (Water; Thick Fat, Huge Power)
Azurill is a quite special baby Pokémon. Have a female Marill hold the item Sea Incense to get hatch it. Azurill is the, on average, second weakest Pokémon, only Sunkern having worser stats. Since Azurill has a different gender ratio than Marill (75% female compared to 50% male), one in three Azurill will turn male when they evolve. Azurill evolves through happiness.
S – Tackle
3 – Defense Curl
6 – Tail Whip
10 – Water Gun
15 – Rollout
24 – Bubblebeam (65 power isn’t something to sneeze at)
28 – Double-Edge
36 – Rain Dance
45 – Hydro Pump

Petalburg Woods – We’re finally starting to see some decent Pokémon. The cocoon Pokémon are good training.
Cascoon – Common
Shroomish – Common
Silcoon – Common
Slakoth – Rare
Taillow – Rare
Wurmple – Common

Shroomish/Breloom: While it’s the Grass moves which are most useful in the beginning, Shroomish becomes a Fighting type once it evolves, and the Fighting moves become more useful at that point onwards. It’s a very good Pokémon this early in the game. The Effect Spore ability is pretty cool, considering it can inflict Paralysis, Poison or Sleep every time it attacks with a Physical attack. (Grass, Fighting; Effect Spore)
S – Absorb
4 – Tackle
7 – Stun Spore
10 – Leech Seed
16 – Mega Drain
22 – Headbutt
23 – Mach Punch (The Quick Attack of the Fighting type)
28 – Counter
36 – Sky Uppercut
45 – Mind Reader
54 – Dynamicpunch (Which sucks, I might add)
Alternatively, if Shroomish doesn’t evolve:
28 – Poisonpowder
36 – Growth
45 – Giga Drain
54 – Spore (100% accuracy to put an opponent to sleep? *drools*)

Slakoth/Vigoroth/Slaking: While it has the worst ability ever (can only move every second turn), it’s Attack is simply monstruous. You shall have to meet these foes later on. Note that because Vigoroth has Vital Spirit (can’t be put to sleep) instead of Truant, it’s an evolutionary stage potentially more useful than the final form. I wouldn’t recommend using this Pokémon in the main adventure, though. (Normal; Truant [Vital Spirit])
S – Scratch
S – Yawn
7 – Encore
13 – Slack Off
19 – Fury Swipes
25 – Endure
31 – Slash
36 – Swagger
37 – Counter
43 – Flail
Alternatively, if Slakoth doesn’t evolve:
19 – Faint Attack
25 – Amnesia
37 – Counter
43 – Flail
Alternatively, if Vigoroth doesn’t evolve:
37 – Counter
43 – Focus Punch
49 – Reversal

I’m not sure what the difference between a forest and a regular Route is, but I suppose they’re more maze-like and has more crazed Bug Catchers (possibly crazed through consumption of mushrooms). As I walk through the forest, I encounter a corpulent, middle-aged man. He asks me if I have seen any mushrooms. Suddenly he panics, and I wonder if maybe he has had some already. I see the cause of his panicking: a sailor emerges from the darkness.

“I am not a kid, I am just a bit short. *snivels*” I reply. I send out Mudkip, and he sends out Poochyena. I swiftly defeat him. I wait for his next Pokémon, but he hasn’t got any! Possibly he has had some mushrooms as well. “Maybe you should bring more than one Pokémon next time, idiot”, I scream at him while he scurries away. The green-suit gave me a Great Ball as thanks. I was just about to rob him of his important papers, when he ran away. Goldurnit.

Well out of the forest, I walk into a florist shop. They give me a Wailmer Pail, a berry and advice about making berries grow. Perhaps subtle hinting that I should make my own flowers instead of harassing them.

Approaching Rustboro, you have your very first Double Battle set up. It’s like a normal battle, but with four Pokémon instead. Moves like Surf and Growl can affect both of the opponents, while Earthquake and Selfdestruct can affect everyone in the battle, so be careful.

Rustboro City – A total of twelve buildings! A metropolis no doubt. Home of the first Pokémon Gym and the Devon corporation.

“You know my intentions all too well.”

Roxanne is the first gym leader. Commander of Rock Pokémon, her defeat will mean you can finally use HM01 Cut, and you will get Rock Tomb. You might notice the gym leaders in Emerald are better than those in Ruby and Sapphire. She has two level 12 Geodude and a level 15 Nosepass.

“Hasta la Vista, baby!”

My level 10 Shroomish managed to disassemble her whole team single-handedly, and gained three levels in the process. Stun Spore negated the speed-lowering effects of Rock Tomb, and Leech Seed was of great help as well.

And that concludes this update.


4 Responses to “Pokémon Emerald Update #3”

  1. Blerd Says:

    I never took you for one to be a source of comedy, and I don’t know whether or not you have intentionally made this entry so, but it’s quite hilarious.

  2. Pokémon Index « Procrastination Embodied Says:

    […] Pokémon Index By procrastinationembodied The playthough of Pokémon Emerald: Update #1 Update #2 Update #3 […]

  3. Optoisolator : Says:

    i think most flower shops these days use plant food to extend the life of cut flowers*-“

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